Foster Care and Families

There are 88000 foster care children in Canada. Every foster care child has their own background and reason for being in foster care, a main reason is abusive parents who are not able to give their child the care and love they need. Alcoholism is also a major reason for a child being forced into foster care. It would be hard if you were put into foster care and not understanding why you can no longer be apart of the family you belong to. It takes time to get use to being with people you don’t know and people who don’t know you. It is also not easy to care for foster kids because of emotional or behavioural issues due to abuse, poverty and neglect. When a child enters foster care they have a lot to deal with lots of people asking personal questions about their lives that they may not feel comfortable sharing. Very quickly counselling becomes a big part of the Childs life. It is important that the child knows that it is not their fault they are in foster care and a child who has that stuck in their head has a hard time understanding that it is not. These kids need love and understanding. They need to feel welcome and safe where they are.
When a child gets adopted it is another huge change. They then have to readjust to another new living environment with new people and new rules. In my opinion people who adopt foster children have to be a special type of person. Raising a child who has been through so much would be a difficult task. Diane is waiting to adopt a foster child: http://www.fosterfamilytalk.blogspot.com/ . 81.5 million people has thought about adopting a child. According to the new National Adoption Attitudes Survey, If just one in 500 of these adults adopt 134,000 children in foster care would have permanent, loving families who they could count on. People who are welcoming a foster child into their home need to be aware of the things they may have to deal with. Even though most of these children have gone through counselling the problems that they had to deal with are still on mind and take time to heal.

parenting.

Discplining your children has been a touchy subject. whether or not it is safe to physically discipline your kids. some people believe to keep there household in shape with an iron fist so to speak. Then others do not believe in physical discipline at all. the parents both have to have an agreement on there views of how to discipline there kids. If they dont agree on the same way to discipline kids it can effect them in some ways. you also have to be consistent with your ways of discipline. When the child does something wrong and say you take away there favorite toy, then when they do it again you cant let them get away with it. it will confuse them. you have to be smart while discipling your child you cant get overwelmed and get mad and then like snap you have to take a minute or two and collect yourself. then go back explain what they did wrong and then tell them why and what there punishment is.

http://www.child-discipline-with-love.com/
http://www.parentwithpassion.com/
http://www.parentwithpassion.com/2009/12/child-discipline-mistakes-parents-make/

Daycare

Daycare is a huge thing to consider. You start by considering if you want your child being raised by someone other than yourself or if you want your child to grow up with other children from a daycare. Your child will be influenced by people and experiences with you not there. Good things that you gain from daycare are that your child learns to interact with other children. They learn to share and excel faster in school. Children should have some interaction with other children when they're young. Daycare is a good way to get your child to play with other kids and have more experience with people. They become more independent at a younger age. The important thing is to have a good quality daycare. Daycare is a necessity for a lot of families they need to provide for their family. A working parent needs to be able to work with out worry. Knowing that you have a quality daycare can ease a parents mind. Studies have shown that children do very well in daycare. A parent should also be able to have a career and children. Continuing to work after having a child is a personal choice if your career is important. More and more parents are working and placing their children in daycare. Statistics show In 2000/01, 85% of children aged six months to five years who lived with a single parent who worked or studied were in some form of child care. This was a significant increase from 78% in 1994/95. Among children who lived in households with two parents who worked or studied, two-thirds (66%) were in child care in 1994/95. By 2000/01, this had increased to nearly 73%. Whatever a person circumstances are, daycare is more and more popular and positive.

Resources:

http://blogs.trb.com/features/family/parenting/blog/2010/05/day_care_yes_no_or_maybe.html

http://www.amotherinisrael.com/over-parenting-and-daycare-dilemmas/

http://twinmommusings.blogspot.com/2010/05/day-care-is-it-risky-stop-guilt-already.html

By: Brooklynn

Single Parenting

Single parents are becoming more and more common these days. In fact, approximately one in five parents today are single parents, and the United States currently has the most single parents in the world, with about 13 million. According to statistics, it is much more common for the mother to take the children during a divorce/break-up, with 84% of custodial parents being mothers and only 16% being fathers. As well, of all households headed by a mother, 44% of them are divorced, 33% were never married, 22% were woman who had remarried, and only 1% were widows.

Being a single parent can really affect a person. Financial factors can become a big issue when the parent is trying to work a full-time job and take care of a child at the same time. There can also be a lot of stress trying to determine how to properly raise the children without the help or opinion of another adult.

The children can be greatly affected when their parents split up. Divorce almost always affects the children for at least a year or two. Immediately before and after the divorce, the child typically shows signs of depression, rebellion, and stress. Whether the distress lasts for a short or long amount of time depends on the stability of the child's life, and the adequacy of the caregiving. However, if the family's income remains stable, the parents don't fight too much, and the caregiving by both parents stays pretty much the same, then the children may not be affected as much.

On the other hand, single parenting can have positive effects. Single parents often spend more one-on-one time with the children, so they can develop stronger bonds with the child than if they were married. The children may also learn how to handle conflict after watching their parents set aside their differences to raise them.

For more information, check out the following websites.
http://singleparenting.suite101.com/article.cfm/single-parent-and-counseling
http://singleparents.about.com/od/parenting/a/cope_divorce.htm
http://www.singleparentingtips.net
http://single-parenting.families.com/blog/
http://www.successfulsingleparenting.com/blog/

Tough Love

You see them lots of places, at the mall, restaurants, parks etc, the parent who is yelling and spanking their child just to embarrass them in front of everyone. Some call this cruel, some call it tough love. But what is tough love? Originally, tough love was developed for use by psychologists to deal with adult drug and mental patients. This was a good method to use with adults at their worst, but what about children still learning about life? How can a child really differentiate love from an act of aggression? They cant, and if this act is repeated enough, the child will believe it. A humiliated child is a emotionally crippled child who can confuse love with cruelty.


When you look back in history you can really see how this parenting style is not the best, for example, Hitler was said to be raised in this "tough love" type of parenting, while Albert Einstien was said to be spoiled, i think everyone is getting where I'm coming from.


Punishment and humiliation are never the answer because they create anger and resentment in the child.
Punishment interferes with the child's ability to learn from experience, if you treat your child with tough love, he/she will more than likely fear new things because they fear if they do wrong they will be publicly embarrassed.
That is why i think that the tough love approach to parenting should be drastically reconsidered.

Discipline

When it comes to disciplining your child it is hard to make a decision on how to do it and when the right time is. When your child breaks the rules that you have set down, they should have consequences for their actions. When he/she does, you have to be patient with them and talk to them about what they have done instead of immediately yelling at them and making unreasonable consequences that you will not follow through with. Research studies have shown that this kind of discipline is harmful to your child. Children who have had this sort of discipline find that it is okay to react back by yelling and causing a fit. Instead, you need to hear the reasoning that they have behind why they missed curfew or why they did something. After you heard them out, you take away something that they enjoy or assign chores that will take them awhile. After they have these consequences, they will learn to the rules that you have set for them and that there is reasoning why you have set these rules. Another way is if you have a young child you can firmly say “no” to them so then they know that what they are doing is not appropriate behavior.

When a child is young, it is more difficult to decide on how to discipline them because they sometimes will not fully understand what you are trying to explain to them. If you take a special toy away they will know what happens when they do not listen. If you’re a parent that believes in spanking their child when they do something wrong, the spanking should be only to teach your child a lesson so he/she understands. But, you should not spank your child just out of anger.

Disciplining your child is not always giving out consequences. It is also about rewarding your child after they have done right and followed the rules that you have set down for them. If they see what happens after you have taken something special away from them, they know not to do it and if you reward them for doing something good, they will try hard to do so. By disciplining and rewarding your child it will help them how to respect others and act appropriately.

Resources:

www.howtodisciplineyourchild.net

http://www.howtodisciplineyourchild.com/

By: Zoey

How Children React to Their Parent's Behaviour

I’m sure most of us believe that when the day comes and we become parents that we will be the best parents ever. However, what we don’t realize is how closely children watch their parents and imitate their actions. For this reason we have to be very careful to make sure we don’t pass our bad habits down to our children, or behave in such ways that it will have a negative impact on the child’s life. Think about it, children who grow up in an unsafe environment are often found in a similar environment when they grow up. As a parent you don’t want that for your child, you want your child to succeed so it is important you set an example for your child to follow. The way you handle anger, stress, etc. all affect your children. According to the website More4Kids.info, a parent's reaction to stress affects the way a child reacts to stress. If a parent reacts negatively, a child will learn to react negatively as well. As well, if you are always freaking out and yelling this can cause your child to act up and misbehave. Young children misbehave about 5% of the time. Knowing how to react to this 5% is crucial. Reacting correctly and consistently can reduce misbehaviour from 5% to less than 2%. Reacting incorrectly can increase misbehaviour to 10% or more. This behaviour doesn’t just happen when the child is young, it will continue as the child grows older and often gets worse.Because of this the type of parenting style you choose is very important! The best parenting style is one where you provide structure for your child but also give them freedom and let them express themselves. You need to be the best of both worlds. You don’t want to be an over controlling strict parent, one who doesn’t care, or a helicopter parent who never shows any trust. Parenting in these last three ways will have a negative impact on your child. The child will also see how you parented and will probably use the same style when they become a parent. It’s important to know your flaws so you can work on them before becoming a parent. I realize that nobody is perfect and your kid won’t be either, however our actions have such an effect on a young child we need to be careful. We shouldn’t be over controlling, we shouldn’t be demanding or threatening towards our children. These are just some of the actions we can eliminate to help our children succeed and grow up healthy. For more information on this topic you can check out these websites:
http://www.livestrong.com/article/75282-parents-effect-child-behavior/http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/275332/human-behaviour/24939/Parents-and-the-socialization-of-the-child　


By: Kelsey

-To Spank or Not to Spank-
Spanking is a very contivercial subject. Many parents are unsure of what to do when there little one is misbehaving. Spanking can be seen as both good and bad, and sometimes is both. As the age differs its either necessary or unnecessary. 0-8 months is unnecessary, what does that young baby know about reactions, that’s the stage where comforting is the best, they don’t intestinally do good or bad. 8-18 months is when a child knows behaviourism (reward and punishment) if the enfant is pulling hair a little slap on the hand and a firm NO is effective, but to wind up and swing at the enfant is harmful, they may become less comforted by you. 18months- 3years is the safety spank ages. If a child who now has learnt to walk is either going to are there selves (running out on the street) or others (hitting , etc) a spank on the bum is appropriate. This age the child tests out the boundaries and responds well to spanking on the bum. Hitting on any other body part at this age is not appropriate. The child may become afraid and nervous or anxious. 3-4 is the discipline spanking ages, while telling a child to not to do something and they follow though anywise ( ex- hitting a sibling, swearing, ect) deserves a spank on the bum and the bum only, this is crucial that you tell the child why they are getting a spank, this has to be done carefully because the child may now become fearful of the person spanking. If done right the child will respect the boundaries set and wont repeat. 4-6 is the last years of spanking, it again should only be on the bum but reasoning could also help school aged kids., since now there in school and spanking is not an option for the teachers to turn to as punishment, reasoning with your kids is necessary.

As a child it only took 3 spankings (not including slaps on the hands) to make me whom I am today. I didn’t get spanked every day. Getting spanked everyday the child may not take the spanking seriously. And at a certain age spanking needs to stop because it’s a minor consequence for older children ( its ok to sneak out because when I get back I only get a spank). Also spanking with a object (wooden spoon, belt , etc) in NOT ok. Also spanking on other body parts besides the bum and hands is NOT ok.

The statistics are very surprising:
- 68 percent of American parents think spanking is not only good but essential to child rearing;
- 90 percent of parents spank their toddlers at least three times a week; two-thirds spank them once a day;
- One in four parents begin to spank when their child is 6 months old, 50 percent when their child is 12 months old;
- 52 percent of 13- and 14-year-olds get spanked; 20 percent of high school seniors do.
The US department of Health & Human services reports 142,000 children are seriously injured from Corporal punishment every year in this country, 18,000 of them are permanently disabled. Between 1-2,000 children die each year in this country alone from Corporal punishment. Nearly 70% of child abuse cases in CPS agencies result from corporal punishment. The defense of "discipline" is raised in 41% of homicide prosecutions when parents "accidentally" kill their children. 99% of people in jail were corporally punished.
63% of the mothers had spanked their child at least once during the previous week. Among those that spanked, they hit their children a little over 3 times per week, on average.
In 1999, the Canadian Medical Association Journal conducted a general population survey of 9953 residents of Ontario aged 15 years and older. The majority of respondents indicated that they had been slapped or spanked, or both, by an adult during childhood "sometimes" (33.4%) or "rarely" (40.9%); 5.5% reported that this occurred "often." The remainder (20.2%) reported "never" experiencing these behaviours. Significantly more female than male respondents reported "never" being slapped or spanked by an adult while growing up (23.9% v. 16.4%).http://www.essortment.com/family/argumentspankin_scgu.htm
http://www.wikihow.com/Include-Spanking-in-Child-Discipline

Source List: http://chastisewithlove.com/statistics.html

http://www.nospank.net/howitz.htm

Child Blindness

Through His Eyes

“Having a blind child is frustrating and scary and heart-wrenching at times; not because of the blindness itself, but because of how other people view it.”

There is an estimated 1.4 million children under the age of 15 that are legally blind and for every minute that passes, another child in the world goes blind. Yet, when we see a child who is visually impaired, we automatically develop our own opinions- “That child will never succeed, never be truly happy, and may never find their place in the world.” We jump to the conclusions without really understanding. Blindness is a disability, meaning a difficulty or trouble. Visual Impairment may detain a child from learning as fast as a child who can see, but that doesn’t mean they can’t learn. Nothing is impossible.
My nephew (who I will refer to as KB) is two years old and is visually impaired. We really don’t know what he can actually see, whether it be light, shadows, or outlines, but the doctor says that the main nerve in both of his eyes is damaged. Blindness, among a few other disabilities, limits how quickly KB learns. Every small thing that he learns is a major accomplishment and is greatly celebrated in our family. Teaching blind children is different in some ways, but in a lot of ways it is the same as teaching a normal child. You have to explain sight in great detail and let the child feel objects to learn how they work. A blind child may believe that things magically appear in their hands if we don’t explain to them where it came from or show them where to get it from. Just like any other child, blind children need love, attention, and lots of recognition for their accomplishments.
I want to really emphasize that just because a child is blind, doesn’t mean you should treat them any different than a sighted-child. It is said that when a person goes blind, their other senses grow stronger. The child can probably sense when don’t believe in them or when you think that they are unable to accomplish a task. The greatest thing you can give to a visually impaired child is your faith. It is really amazing to see what blind people can accomplish when they believe that they can do anything. I read an article about a small boy who went blind at a young age, but learned to cope with this new way of life. This article is really inspirational. It proves that anything is possible as long as you believe. To read this article, click the linkà http://www.justreader.com/2010/04/boy-who-can-see-without-his-eyes.html .
More than 75% of the world’s blindness is preventable or treatable. I think what really bothers me about KB’s vision is that it probably could have been prevented. Although it cannot be proven, I have come to believe that his visual impairment was caused by poor treatment and lack of nourishment. KB is my brother’s child, but he had nothing to do with him until it was already too late. KB’s mother may have consumed alcohol and drugs during pregnancy. As a baby, he was undernourished and dehydrated. Because of this, KB had a stroke when he was 3 months old and was put on life support. He could have died because the doctors were about to shut off the life support. KB pulled through at the last minute and began to recover. This is a moment that has shaped his whole life thus far; just when you think he is incapable of pushing through, he does. I’m not entirely sure when he officially went blind, but I do know for sure that he was not born blind. He could have been a normal little boy, but instead, his sight was taken from him at such a young age.
My life has drastically changed in the last year; in fact it’s changed for the better. From the day that KB first came to live with my family, I knew he was a miracle. He was a year old, but all he could do was lie on his back and shake a toy rattle. I look back at that day and realize that he has come so far. KB is almost walking, feeding himself, and really understanding the world around him. I remember the day that I was told that KB may never walk. I look back now and smile because pretty soon KB is going to prove all those doctors wrong. It is amazing to see what he can accomplish when we believe in him. The following quote sums up the last experiences of my life:

"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be."

Farther Reading:
http://www.brailleinstitute.org/facts_about_sight_loss
http://hubpages.com/hub/Raising-a-Blind-Child-The-First-Year
http://www.worldaccessfortheblind.org/node/123
http://onemorethingtofeelguiltyabout.blogspot.com/2010/05/where-i-needed-to-be.html
http://www.wonderbaby.org/articles/raising-a-blind-baby.html

Childhood obesity is something that all parents should be concerned about, and yet with our busy, distracted lifestyles we often take shortcuts that jeopardize our health and fitness. Sometimes it’s a matter of getting through the day. There are some alarming statistics about how our bad habits are affecting our children. A Statistics Canada report from 2004 Nutrition: Findings from the Canadian Community Health Survey http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/82-620-m/2005001/pdf/4193660-eng.pdf confirms what we already have heard numerous times. Habits like eating at the table, reducing screen time, and making healthy food choices make childhood obesity less of a risk. But these habits are also a responsibility of parents. These ideas are reinforced in the Childhood Obesity Blog: http://childhood--obesity.blogspot.com. Author Gary J Kidd explains that the parents are most at fault for the obesity crisis, but that schools are an important part of the solution, as well.

I try my best to feed my kids nutritious foods and put them in activities that will keep them active several times a week. But my kids have a taste for junk food, especially my seven year-old son, who loves his Doritos and Chicken Nugget Happy Meals. My daughter, on the other hand, has become a little more conscious of her choices. As a figure skater, she is starting to see herself as an athlete, and an athlete’s lifestyle has the on ice, as well as off ice component. She understands that chowing down a box of oreos defeats the purpose of spending three hours training on the ice, and that oreos are a once-in-a-while treat, rather than a dietary staple. Blogs like Nourishing Thoughts http://www.nourishinteractive.com/blog can give parents ideas for meal planning and information about dietary choices.

There is also a lot of online support for keeping your kids active. FitFactorKids Blog http://www.fitfactorkidsblog.blogspot.com Parents looking to inform themselves about ways to keep kids active can find many sites to point them in the right direction.

With all the information and support available, I feel confident that I can continue to learn about kids’ health and nutrition, while you still may see my purple minivan in the McDonald's drive-thru from time to time.

Mrs. Yuzik

FINAL ASSIGNMENT FOR LIFE TRANSITIONS 20 30 Parenting Unit

1) Think about topics that interest you under the umbrella of PARENTING: discipline, kids and TV/Cellphones, Single parenting, parenting after divorce, step-families, choosing NOT to have kids, effective parenting from a child's perspective, childhood nutrition (obesity), children using the internet, verbal abuse, childcare and daycare

2) Find and follow THREE decent bloggers on parenting. You find these by doing a google search of parenting blogs. You need to ASSESS whether or not the blogs are worthwhile. You have to look around, though...your blogger should be up-to-date blogging regularly.

3) Post a comment on one of the blogs. I need to see what you wrote, so if you know how, take a screen shot and email it to me @ camille.yuzik@spiritsd.ca . Hit the print screen button and then paste it into Word, for example.

4) Find at least TWO online articles in your area of interest. You should link these to your blog post.

5) Find at least two statistics related to your topic.

6) Post a well-written blog entry on our classroom parenting blog. In your entry, you should mention the articles you found (post links) and statistics, as well as reviews of the blogs you found.

7) If you are high-tech, post a related video to your post.

8) You must cite your sources at the bottom of your blog entry.

DUE DATE FOR FINAL ASSIGNMENT: Wednesday, May 19th.